We Try Harder

A telephone conversation overheard:

Hello?

I'd like to make a complaint. My hat is too small.

That's right. My hat is too small.

Hang on a moment, that's my other line...

... Hello, Avis how may I... Hmmm wrong number.

Ah yes, as I was saying, my hat is too small.

What do you mean that's the fashion? Just look at it. It doesn't even fit.

Well yes, I suppose if it is perched on top like that it does stop 'hat hair'... But what about a stiff breeze? Did you ever think of that?

True, it doesn't normally blow a gale indoors, but I think that's rather beside the point.

I'm having my picture taken tomorrow for the cover of a book of matches and the hat's too small and I don't want it.

No, no, no, oh please don't cry.

It's a lovely hat really, I'm not complaining about the quality of the product, the felt is very good, it holds its shape and...

...Damn, there's the other phone again.

Hello Avis, how can I help you?

No dear, not Mavis, Avis, we're a car rental company. That's quite all right. You have a good afternoon too.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult you but about that hat, I, ah...

Well I guess the problem could be with the size my head... Now look here! I phoned to complain, not be insulted. A...

Uh-hm...The boss's wife... chose the uniform design herself you say.

Yes, yes, I see you're quite right. Well, sorry to have bothered you.